I forbade my husband to send money to his mother

Today’s story is about a wife who, feeling neglected in her marriage, decides to take a position against her husband’s frequent financial support of his mother. This decision, made to safeguard their immediate family’s well-being, triggers a chain reaction of emotional consequences, including ᴀᴄᴄᴜsᴀᴛɪᴏɴs and hurt feelings.

She explained what happened.

My husband, Matteo, and I have been married for four months and together for three years. While we were dating, his mother would occasionally phone to ask him for money, ranging from $2,000 to $6,000. He added that this had been going on for years, but because he had a well-paying job, he didn’t mind giving her the money.

My father-in-law is a prosperous businessman, and they have joint accounts, so I’ve always wondered why she had to beg Matteo for money. When we got engaged, we talked about her financial requests, and my husband agreed to cease providing money. He followed through, and she stopped phoning after he denied her requests.

However, this Tuesday, my mother-in-law called and begged Matteo for $15,000, claiming she needed it for a trip. When he declined, she sent me a lengthy text ᴀᴄᴄᴜsɪɴɢ me of meddling in her relationship with her son. I didn’t respond. Concerned, I asked my husband if his parents were hurting financially, but he said everything looked OK.

I broached the matter with my father-in-law and sister-in-law over lunch today. When my father-in-law was assisting us in selecting wine, I casually inquired about the state of affairs at home. He seemed perplexed, so my husband explained about the recent money request.

That’s when everything began to unravel. It turns out that my MIL had been surreptitiously asking Matteo for money for quite some time. My FIL disclosed that she had been withdrawing money from their joint account last year, claiming it was to help with our wedding expenses—a falsehood, as we had never received any funds from her.

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My FIL departed right after, and a few hours later, my MIL called in tears, blaming me of ruining her life by “spilling everything.” My FIL eventually gave us a cheque to return the money, and he is currently separated from her until he can trust her again. Meanwhile, my husband’s maternal relatives ʙʟᴀᴍᴇ me and call me the terrible guy.

People stood on her side.

“You’re not the one who has been lying and leeching for money. Hope your FIL divorces her.” Unknown author / Reddit

“You asked out of concern, and you brought what sounds like tens of thousands of dollars in spending to his attention that she had been hiding, for whatever reasons. If she needed the money for a good reason, she wouldn’t have been lying about it.” Bubbly_Chicken_9358 / Reddit

“You busted a gold-digging scammer, out of concern and love for your husband and his father. It’s natural to feel guilty for upsetting someone, and for big life changes to happen to others. But sometimes it’s necessary to upset someone and change circumstances.” HippieMama710 / Reddit

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“The maternal relatives that are calling you a bad guy were probably the ones benefiting from the money.” TheLastWord63 / Reddit

“If anyone ruined your mother-in-law’s life, it was herself.” ZealandRedSquirrel / Reddit

“You’re not a bank, neither is your husband, MIL has misused the trust of her son and husband. Seems like she wants to have power over her son and uses the money method to know that.” Grgivmy / Reddit

As the issue progresses, it becomes clear that such painful decisions are sometimes required for the health and stability of a marriage. The story emphasizes the value of communication, mutual respect, and clear limits in sustaining familial bonds as well as the strength of a marriage.

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